The United States (and Larry David) vs. The Vagina

75 years ago this week, Disney released the short film “The Story of Menstruation.” The film is believed to be the first screenplay to say the word “vagina.” No Disney films since then have said “vagina.” Larry David will never work for Disney. He likes saying “vagina” too much.

As Curb Your Enthusiasm’s 11th season is now underway, I anxiously anticipate Larry’s first vaginal citation of the new season. After previously discussing numb vaginas, itchy vaginas, big vaginas and magical vaginas over the series 21 year run, could the “moist” or “dry” vagina next to be dissected?

In the infamous “Palestinian Chicken” episode from 2011, Larry summed up his vaginal obsession with supreme simplicity. “The penis doesn’t care about race, creed, and color. The penis wants to get to his homeland. It wants to go home!”

Larry first outed his vaginal concerns years earlier, on Seinfeld, where the show tackled the clitoris, the vulva, the “counter-clockwise swirl” and the “pinch.”

All joking aside, America’s most contested vaginal debate (abortion) is currently under review by the Supreme Court, thanks to a newly enacted Texas…